Our Diary

As bed time nears we have a negotiation ritual each day.

‘Mama can we please have one story today?'

And as I am a little strict about A sticking to her bed time each night, some days I have to decline. She is getting better at her negotiation skills though. Last night she said, “You know, right? I will not always ask you to read me a story and I will not always need a torch light, I will grow up some day”

 :(

With THAT dialogue and some drama not only did she manage one, but two stories from me!  

When I look back now, I realise I have actually learnt a lot from her in the last five years. Today being Children’s day, it just seems like the perfect opportunity to thank her for this gift of motherhood and a lot more. 

So here's a letter to you dearest A,

Thank you for all the little things you have made me relearn over the last few years! 

• To wake up with a smile- Right from the way you wake up each morning with a big smile on your face and so much cheer, and no agenda really:), makes me realise we must slow down and enjoy each day as it comes. Smile and spread the cheer. Each day is a new day and we need to start afresh without carrying any baggage from the day that went by! 
• To value the small things in life - The way you tell me your endless tales each night right before sleeping - makes me realise the little little things that are so important for you. You make me want to pay attention to all the small things and the little conversations I have around me. 
• A lot of patience, A LOT! - Well, your endless conversations that happen at your sweet (read: very slow) pace have made me very patient too! 
• The ability to laugh unfettered - Laughing at the silliest of things and being unfettered and not just be able to do this after downing 3 glasses of wine! :P. Laugh as though no one's watching you :) 
• Being kind - The other day when I came back home, this little one left a note on the fridge for her nanny saying that she missed her and was glad she is back from her leave. She also said I love you didi. Made me realise how important it was to express how you feel towards other people. We rarely get the time to tell others how we feel these days! Leave aside just expressing how much you love them. I hope you never stop saying goodbye to me each morning with a small kiss and that sweet I love you mama! That truly makes my day.
• To be happy, joyful and excited about every thing you do. Even a mundane task like cleaning up or laying the table is done with much enthusiasm. You make me see the joy in doing the most mundane tasks. 
• Learning to express my feelings. How you feel about things around you, about things you felt bad, about things you enjoyed each day. About the laughter you shared with your friends or the joy you had in playing a prank! Being able to express what you are feeling and voice it out is something I have learnt from you!
• To be inquisitive. The whys can be annoying at times, am sure all moms will agree. But it’s amazing how you will always ask me things you don’t know and not be ashamed of how silly the question might be! 
• To go that extra mile for my friends. Childhood and friendships are precious. I think as we grow we become these humans who are so absorbed in their life between work, home and kid. Thanks to you, I would have reconnected with a couple of my older friends and may be made that effort to pick up the phone and make that pending conversation.
• Letting go! This one I still need to master :). I think with the ease I ask you to let go of that Elsa doll at the toy shop or the little pony, I too should train my self to let go that one dress I really want :D

Well, the list will go on! But here’s a small wish for you on this special day, I hope your life turns out to be such, that each day you get to do something that makes your heart sing! 

We are living in a time when entrepreneurship is in its full bloom, people are full of ideas, people want to take risks and dream big, people want to lead a life on their own terms and slog it out to make that happen.

On the outside it does look quite pretty - to lead a life on your own terms. But only people in the start up world know what it takes - the hours, the non existent social life, the struggle, the anxieties, the months without salary.

There’s a lot that we give to our businesses, our so called babies.

But I’ve realised there’s a lot more that my business has given to me in 1.5 years than I could have ever managed on my own.

So here’s writing a letter to my business today.

Dear Love the World Today,

We started out a while back and I honestly didn’t think it would be such a tough and satisfying ride. I always hated the term ‘business’ and I remember being shy of telling the world that I’ve started my own business out of fear of being looked down upon as someone who has sold their soul to the big bad world driven by money. But I’ve seen such a transformation in the past 1.5 years thanks to all that you’ve brought into my life. I now take immense pride in saying that I’m the co-founder of a purposeful business. You’ve given me so much and I must let you know how thankful I am for that,

1. Thank you for changing my buying habits. I used to be someone who loved shopping and loved brands. I cannot stand malls anymore. I prefer researching a brand and understanding the make of clothes before buying them - what fabric it uses, where is it stitched and why it costs the way it costs. I’m happier owning a LOT LESSER but knowing that every outfit I wear is made responsibly, will last me long and even though it may not be trendy, it represents me and can be worn in a lot of other ways.
2. Thank you for making me hate plastic. I take immense pride in carrying cloth bags when I step down to buy some groceries. I take immense pride in my little steel bottle and copper water bottle that go with me wherever I go. I’ll be honest though that everytime I pack a courier for LTWT, I don’t know how to safeguard the delicate handwoven whites and end up putting those few pieces in seal kings and ofcourse the courier bag itself. I can only hope that these are getting reused by the homes that they go to - to store shoes or paper or pack dabbas.
3. My husband made me realise that we can get rid of body washes and move to soaps since we’ll reduce the packaging trash we create. And I happily embraced the idea which I may not have done earlier.
4. No more straws for me with coconut water at home.
5. I’ve finally mustered the courage to order cloth panty liners.
6. I value nature way more than before. I’ve always been a nature lover but I feel a sense of ownership and responsibility now. The world truly is ours and we are nothing but teeny tiny smallies in front of it.
7. I’ve met some of the most beautiful and inspiring people through my journey. The guys at Happy Startup School and Ashram Week. All the social entrepreneurs through Unlimited India. And it makes me so happy and hopeful that in spite of all that’s wrong with the world, there are people who care.
8. Oh! And my wedding outfits were a dream thanks to you. For all I cared was that these are classic handwoven textiles and nothing synthetic. I know I’m going to use my wedding outfits for years to come.
9. I only buy what I absolutely need and love. I care for my things a lot more.
10. My new home doesn’t have much storage space because we realised that if we don’t have storage space, we won’t be tempted to buy and hoard. And it’s actually possible to fit your whole world in pretty much a wardrobe.

Of course, the more you read and research on sustainability, it’s like pandora’s box and now I’m beginning to see the true extent of damage we might have caused to the world around us, how every single choice we make (right from the toothbrush we use) affects the planet and I also feel depressed at times that we might have reached a point of no return. But something inside of me tells me that we’ve got to try.

So here it is, a small list of all positive things you’ve brought to my life. They may seem really small but to me they are a big change in who I am and who I am becoming. And that to me is far more important than any other ambition.

Love!

It’s been almost 6 days now into the new-year and I had some thought provoking questions to ask myself that included what am I doing in life and where am I headed. Not simple questions for sure!

It looks all rosy to be living a start-up life, well, from the outside. But no one told me it’s going to be such a bittersweet struggle.

There have been times in the beginning, when we have struggled with cash flows. You are constantly worried about when will you break even, and the financial viability of your business. Exciting times, aren’t they? Then there are times when the sales are lower as compared to other months, times when a product line takes off slowly and doesn’t perform the way you expected it to. And there are times when you are struggling with production hiccups. At times you are just following your gut, taking the risks, simply because you are passionate about what you are doing and see some meaning in all of this. And at the same time, you feel alienated because not many relate to what you are doing and the purpose of your business.

In the last one-year or more, both of us have done a lot of labor work (quite literally). Managed operations, logistics, quality checking, tagging clothes, packing couriers, being the delivery boy, the accountant, the runner - all of which you may not associate with an entrepreneur life. You name it and we have done it all. And then in the middle of all this, yes I have wondered – What am I doing?

And then ofcourse you are sometimes tempted to go back to that not so cushy but well paying job that will sort most of your material life goals, ensure you go on holidays every three months and much more.  

And then since we are human, at times we, actually not at times, but many a times have self-doubt – which I feel is the biggest struggle when you are out on your own. Sub-consciously, there is also this struggle to prove yourself to others and to the society you live in.  The struggle is against our conditioning and the amount of importance we give to everyone else around us but ourselves.

And it’s these times that are the testing times. That make you ponder each and every decision you have taken in the past.

And in the middle of this retrospection, I chanced upon the below image, the emotional journey of an entrepreneur  –

Coincidently it came by at the right time. I had a hearty laugh when I looked at this and it completely resonated with me.

Other than the downs and struggles associated with any new venture, it made me think of all that we have managed to create in the last one year. What reaffirmed this was the appreciation from most customers and fellow parents who simply loved what we were doing, loved our designs and appreciated our brand for great quality. And then we had parents who went a step ahead and opted for organic cotton clothing for their little one's birthday and shared pictures with us, adding more cheer to our routine days!

May be there is something we are doing right! 

Gave a kick to myself and I am back on track. I don’t know if we will land up creating something great, but then I thought to myself the journey itself definitely will be worth it. And yes, we are proud of what we have created.

The task on hand for us is quite challenging, given more than just selling children’s clothes we are hoping to create a mindset change around responsible buying. We are hoping parents will choose sustainable options for their children and move away from the throwaway culture.

Since it’s that time of the year when you want to look back, and identify things that helped you be on track - I would like to reiterate these things to myself so that I keep walking!

 Below is my list, not in any particular order. The ones that kept me on track.

1. Passion and drive for what I am doing
2. My partner in crime
3. Milestones that we set for LTWT
4. Having mentors to bounce off your ideas and yes at times kick your ass
5. Knowing the numbers and financial goals as a business
6. Celebrating small wins
7. Family who believes in you and what you are doing. Appreciates the trade off’s you are making and sees the worth in it
8. Faith, having faith!

And yes not to forget the humor in the middle of all of this chaos!